Question

What are some ways that parents can reduce parent-adolescent conflict? Consider such things as curfews, choice of friends, keeping a room clean, respect for adults, and rules for dating.

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Class: Adolescent Psychology (PS221)

Answer 1

• I think its important for parents to just understand that their teen children are going through a life changing phase.Adolscence is the most crucial phase of a child's life and conflicts are bound to happen.
• By putting curfews and controlling them too much would backfire completely. To reduce conflicts its importamt for parents to understand their child's behaviour and what they are going through buy communicating with them calmly and patiently rather than enforcing their own opinions on their children.
• Parents might disagree about things like what your child wears, what she/he does with her time, or how long she’s/he's allowed to be on social media.This is pretty normal. As your child’s thinking and understanding of the world develops, he might start to question and challenge you more. This is part of his journey towards independence and responsible young adulthood.
• On top of that, some conflict in relationships is healthy. It shows that parents and their child are individuals with their own views. Conflict can help to get to know each other as adults and to consider each other’s needs. But too much is not going to take the situation anywhere.
• Parents need to reflect on their own feelings when they were teens and be flexible about little issues. They need to be open about their feelings with their children and this will help the child to understand why you want him or not want to him to do certain things.
• Ofcourse,little control from parents is required in terms of keeping a track of your child's activities right from to with their friends but not to the point of intrusion.
• Parents need to express their views simply and briefly, making it clear that their main concern is for the child’s wellbeing, now and in the future. Teenagers who feel their parents are asking questions because they care are more likely to share the information they need. Stopping them without any apt reason will make the child more rebellious.
• If parents have to say ‘no’, try to do it in a calm, understanding and respectful way. For example, ‘I understand that you want a tattoo. But you’re 13 and you’ve got a lot of time to think about it. So right now, the answer is no’.