Question

Think of a project that you recently began or considered beginning. What did you tell yourself when you began the project or failed to begin the project? Think of a time you were feeling lonely. What were you telling yourself at that time? Think of a day when you were feeling stressed or overwhelmed at work or school. What were you telling yourself at that chaotic time? Think of a criticism you recently received from a fellow student, coworker, boss or teacher. What were you telling yourself? Think of a recent compliment you received from a coworker, team member, fellow student, boss or teacher. What were you saying to yourself when you received this compliment? Think of a day when you were feeling negative about yourself. What were you saying to yourself at the time? Think of a day when you were experiencing an illness? What were you telling yourself at the time of your illness?

You now have notes on your internal dialogue in a number of different situations. Review the notes you have made for yourself and write a brief summary of your internal dialogue (300 words). Is your self talk more positive or more negative in nature? We all have episodes of negative self talk, but if it dominates your internal dialogue, there is a good chance it is keeping you from accomplishing some of your goals.

Identify 3 mental distortions in your self talk. How can you change your self talk to free yourself of these mental distortions? Write a summary (300 words) that identifies the mental distortions you have identified and outline how you can change these mental distortions

Answer 1

Summary of internal dialogue: Whenever there is a situation which puts in in stress or problem, I start loosing trust in myself at initial level. At the times of losses or negative dialogues, I start pushing myself with the thoughts like that of I am not the right fit or I have not prepared well to be a right fit where I am that's why I am getting such low treatment.

In such scenarios, being an introvert I find a guiding force in ownself, I try to remember the projects, tasks and jobs where I have done well and received the praise for my performance. I have to stand for myself and it gives me a chance to do so. I also start looking at the shortcomings of those who made me feel low, to justify that they are not worthy of making me feel low.

Whenever I get some positive feedback or praises, or any positive moments, I start feeling and backing myself that it is all I deserve and I am the obvious choice for this. So a lot of self praise.

I think my self talks are more on positive sides, because I conquor my doubts in those internal talks but I do see multiple mental distortions in my internal talks:

1. Polarized thinking: I see things as failure or scuess and even sight examples from past in those terms only, but there are multiple sub-experiences out of those journies, which I need to better understand, it will bring me towrds more open and positive internal talks.

2. Personalization: Whenever someone says something to me, it gets into my subconscious with a lot of personalizatrion, so all the communication become direct, in such cases internal talks become more on the negative aspects. So, I need to develop a fresh perspective in understanding such things. I think, I need to be asking questions to people or self when I think something is directed towards me, rather than judging iit must be clear at first hand.

3. Fairness Fallacy: I my internal talks, I act like a judge exactly knowing what is fair and what is not, but there most be perspective of others or situation must also be incorporated, otherwie I may be doing a lot of positive internal talks but even then it will not be leading to a purposeful result. To this I think, looking at things from a third person perspective would help me in visualizing real picture.

PS: I have done this exercise on myself. I would suggest you to please take this exercise, it would help you in knowing your internal communicator better and removing biases. It would turn out to be more than an assignment.