Question

write an essay about Emotional intelligence by daniel goleman and NVC by rosenberg about 5 pages

Answer 1

Daniel Goleman, another American psychologist, later built on their work and published his well-known books on the subject. He also produced a framework for emotional intelligence, which consists of five elements known as Goleman’s framework.

Motivation - the drive to work and succeed

Self-awareness - understanding yourself, your strengths and weaknesses and how you appear to others

Self-regulation - the ability to control yourself and think before you act

Empathy - how well you understand other peoples' viewpoints

Social skills - communicating and relating to others
It helps most if you are looking for a way to understand how emotions work and what is 'EI'. It unravels the capability of individuals to recognize their own emotions and completely changes one's thinking, behavior towards everything. The book shares deep insights on how important is emotional intelligence (EI) in life and how it can be developed with some practice in a simplistic manner that it becomes usable in every aspect of life. I would recommend this book to every commoner and especially to the individuals who is facing emotional ups and downs.

Below are the biggest lessons I learned while reading NVC:
1)1) Observe without Evaluating

This is one of the biggest ones for me. I now notice that in nearly every conversation, someone is mixing observation and judgement.

We create many problems for ourselves by using static engage to express or capture a reality that is ever changing — by mixing evaluation and observation.

NVC doesn’t mandate that we remain completely objective and refrain from all judgements, just that we make a separation between our observations and evaluations, because people are apt to hear criticism.
2)All judgements are expressions of unmet needs. Connect them to feelings and needs.

For example, If I ask a question about what someone has just said, and that person responds, “That’s a stupid question,” I choose to sense what the other person might need as expressed through that particular judgment of me. For example, I might guess that a need for understanding was not being fulfilled when I asked that particular question.

3)Judgements become self-fulfilling prophecies

This is one of the ones that seems obvious, but it’s actually quite hard to change your behavior.
4)Differentiate between triggers and causes.

NVC posits that people are disturbed not by things, but by the view they make of them. In other words, what others may say and do may be thetrigger, but never the cause, of our feelings. Our feelings result from how wechoose to receive what others say and do, and our particular needs/expectations in that moment.

This is easy to say, and hard to do. NVC suggests we internalize this by changing our language — replace language that implies lack of choice with language that acknowledges choice.
5)If you want to be miserable, compare yourself to other people.

In his book How to Make Yourself Miserable, Dan Greenburg suggests that if readers have a sincere desire to make life miserable for themselves, they might learn to compare themselves to other people. For those unfamiliar with this practice, he provides a few exercises. The first one displays full-length pictures of a man and a woman who embody ideal physical beauty by contemporary media standards. Readers are instructed to take their own body measurements, compare them to those superimposed on the pictures of the attractive specimens, and dwell on the differences.