Question

We are almost finished the semester and we have learned quite a lot about public speaking and group work. Some of you may have had some great experiences in a group and others might have had issues. This does not come from luck, but how we build relationships and how we use communication. Understanding people and contexts better enables us to better achieve win-win solutions in our interpersonal daily conversations. Think about how you communicate on dates, in friendships, and in public. Do you reveal everything about yourself instantly. Remember that our social media sites are often basically an A - Z of who we are once someone is connected. Do we want all that information out there? Is it better to meet someone and slowly exchange information? Are you the type that immediately adds someone you like to your social group online? What are the consequences? What can you learn from the different models of self-disclosure and communication climates? Think of a situation in the past that would have benefited from this knowledge.

Answer 1

In the contemporary time, when social media largely rules and influences the life of each and every individual, it is almost impossible to lead a very private life. But individuals who prefer privacy, are able to maintain a strong distance and safely disclose their whereabouts on such public platforms.

However the real life works very differently. Always, meeting a person, face-to-face and having a direct contact is considered to be an appropriate and a tested sure shot method, for it largely reduces the chances of hoax, pretend and faking of identities. Looking around for instances and incidences reveals that the major cases of cheat, fraud and treachery arise from communications happening across a virtual platform, where an unaware, yet naive individual, carelessly shares all his/her personal information to a stranger. it is thus a must follow advice, which is largely ignored by many of us, that 'THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK'. A critical analysis of the situation, the need of the hour and the just requirement of such exchanges must be analyzed thoroughly, before proceeding further.

The ability to negotiate for one's own requirements over the demands of the person in front of us, is completely essential for effective and efficient communications. Revelations need to be made only after strong bond has been created or if a mutual understanding has been created. Such exchanges should only happen when a mutual ground for opening up has been created by both the involved individuals. It is a time taking course, but the formula and time for breaking the ice varies from person-to-person. It is important to acknowledge the importance of this process of gradually making revelations about one's own life as there occurs a systematic and emotional sharing of information that fosters strengthening of bond between two individuals, involved in any relationship, be it a love affair, or a heart to heart conversation with friends. The only scenario where early revelation of certain, or only specific aspects of personal life become important to be shared are in public settings, where it comes as a requirement in some settings and under some circumstances.

I do not belong to that category of individuals who take a hasty decision in accepting the friend requests or adding people without prior analyses, on their social media list. It takes me a long time and in fact sometimes I just ignore the requests coming from a completely unknown person, for I am too skeptical about the identity of the person, in cases where they seem completely unnecessary or unimportant to me. Call it a safety tactics, but it has always paid me off well, and never made me regret the decisions.

• Reference to model of Self-Disclosure - In the context of Johari window model, for the sake of revelations to occur, it can be considered that the enlargement of the "UNKNOWN" space and its incorporation in the open area, is possible only by indulging in open exchange of information with various people, for one tends to gain better insights upon the forbidden or undiscovered arenas of one's personality through self -discovery, other's striking discovery or through shared observation. But the required exposure or disclosing of one's own information is only essential to expand the base of "HIDDEN" information, in order to express the not so known aspects of one's personality, in order to gain benefits from the communication.

JOHARI WINDOW

Known by self                                        Unknown by self

OPEN (known by others also) BLIND (known by others) opens by constructive feedback from others HIDDEN (not known by others) opens only through self - disclosure during communication UNKNOWN (not known by others also) opens only through revelations, by self-discovery, discovery by others or shared observation

• Reference to influence of communication climates - the overall feeling or mood of two communicating people is converged under the umbrella term of communication climates. such feelings and emotions largely impact the quality of interactions shared by two or more individuals. The antecedent events always influence the kind of people and the type of interaction an individual is going to indulge in with the other person. Thus it is always advisable that in case of situations where one has been exposed to certain traumatic or completely upsetting antecedent events,or when the amount of vulnerability to emotional weakness is highest, one must always tend to avoid exchange of information on social media platform. As the self-exposure to get catharsis,thought might backfire in a terrible and tragic way, if the information gets in the hand of a ill-minded person. Thus self-disclosure, according to me, to form relationships, is appropriate to occur under confirming climates that largely include recognition messages from the strangers (eg: I am glad that I am being able to talk to you again) and acknowledgement messages (eg: That's not good to have happened with you, do you want me to meet and talk?) or endorsement messages from the known (eg: Yes I understand why you are so upset, that's too painful to go through..) are appropriate climates according to me.