Question

Case Study #2

John and Michael, in their mid 30s, seek couples sessions to deal with their constant fighting. As their therapist you treat their relationship as you would any other couple's relationship, helping them address communication skills within their relationship. As the work proceeds, it is revealed that John is out to his family (who accepts him entirely) and publicly, while Michael does not want his family to know he is gay. This is frustrating to John, who wants a “normal life, including Michael’s family being part of my family.” Michael reports to the therapist that he wants to communicate to his partner, John the terrible anxiety he feels in light of his family’s religious beliefs, particularly his fear that his family will likely never accept him or his relationship with John. In their most recent session, John and Michael disclose that that have gotten engaged and are planning their wedding as well as discussing a future in which they plan to adopt a child. While this should be a happy time in their relationship, it has led to further dispute due to Michael’s unwillingness to share this news with his family.

2. How would you assess this couple within a contextual perspective of LGBTQ issues?

3. How would you intervene with this couple within a contextual perspective of LGBTQ issues?

Answer 1

O2. How would you assess this couple within a contextual perspective of LGBTQ issues?

Within the LGBTQ perspective, one of the partners wants that their relationship should be like other couples where both the families will be involved, whereas, Michael knows that due to the conservative nature of his family, they will most probably not be accepting the relationship. In this case, john’s family has agreed to the relationship. It has to be explained to Michael that their relationship should not bear the stigma of being deviant or of the LGBTQ relationship. Since, they are now engaged, it definitely means that Michael as well takes the relationship seriously and wants it to last for lifetime, but one can’t travel in two boats at the same time. He has to be confident about the relationship and tell his parents about his se-xual orientation.

3. How would you intervene with this couple within a contextual perspective of LGBTQ issues?

In order to intervene, it is Michael who first needs to develop his confidence in the relationship and that he would try his best to convince his parents. An already dismissive attitude will not help much in convincing. Follows by this, he requires to tell his parents about his engagement. Also, John wants a pretty normal life for the two and that is perfectly fine to ask. With the dilemma of family and relationship, Michael would become more stressed and there could be conflicts within the two. Thus, Michael should be disclosing his choice to his parents.

Also, the parents could be made to understand that there is nothing wrong associated with being a part of the LGBTQ community and that it should be accepted as it is. For this, Michael has to be ready to explain his point of view and his future prospects. With John and how good a Person John is. If required, both the parents could be made to sit for a discussion and john’s parents could convince Michael’s parents in a more convincing manner.