Question

Managing interpersonal relationships: What are the Layers of Self Disclosure? Which layers do you think are appropriate to discuss on your “first date?”

Answer 1

Social Penetration theory brings out four stages in self-disclosure such as, orientation, exploratory affective, affective and stable stage. According to the onion metaphor, the first two layers consists of the personal information about each other. First layer consists of personal information while second layer consists of preferences. Third stage one would describe the goals and aspirations while in the fourth stage one would discuss the religious aspirations. In the fifth stage, one would discuss one’s deep fantasies and fears and in the final stage the concept of one’s self. One could only stay on the orientation stage of the self-disclosure during the first date because it’s all about getting to know about each other not on a deep level but on a peripheral level in order to build trust.

However, it could also be mapped with the stages. During the orientation stage, one would only disclose information on a peripheral level such as some personal information and the talk would revolve around likes and dislikes. During the exploratory stage, people would construct a more positive attitude towards each other although many relationships do not get past this because people would start sharing some sensitive information about themselves. During the affective stage people would start liking each other for what they are by accepting them as they are which would help them move to the next stage, stable in which the relationship would be set. Although there is also a de-penetration stage in which individuals bid goodbye because of various reasons, most relationships stay stable.

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