Question

Describe TWO factors an "essential secret" has on the development of patterns of closeness within a real or fictional family. Use specific examples of an essential secret that could be used in a family.

Answer 1

In a family, if a toxic secret can sabotage any relationship. But, not all secrets are harmful.

Essential Secrets: Essential secrets are the secrets that define the boundaries of the relationship. The can enhance closeness among family members, and they should be respected.These may also include secrets that were hidden, but is best to be revealed to the respective person, for one's own good, or for that of others.

Example 1: As youngsters, it is often difficult to let know anyone in our family, about our wrong addictions to things, be it drugs,drinking or anything that is illegal. This is an essential secret, and sharing it with someone close, who can understand, increases the incloseness with that person.

Example 2: As a couple, it is important to share any secrets with your partner, for satisfaction and longetivity of the relationship.This includes sharing any secrets of past relationships, and other things that your partner needs to know.

Such secrets when revealed, should be accepted, and the person should be appreciated for his/her honesty.