Question

Byron is a stressed adolescent from a dysfunctional family. His dad died when he was 13. They had been very close, so when his mom remarried about a year later, Byron had a hard time adjusting to the new home environment. His Mom who is considered to be loving suddenly changed upon the death of his Dad. She never shows care and sympathy to him for both of them are still grieving. Byron is so annoyed seeing his Mom cuddled by his stepdad. He was always sad and in argument with his Mom. Their communication became complicated until he found himself in a dark environment.

His stepdad talked about how much God loved him, but Byron didn't want to hear it... just like he didn't want to hear the teachers in the school assembly say “things get better; that suicide nor drugs is not the answer”. Byron had lived through the years of anger, pain, and emptiness looking for better. It didn't exist.

Byron separated himself from reality and from the people who loved him. "There were people in my life that cared about me," he said. "The way I wrote to them in my suicide letters was so deep. Why couldn't I go to them and say, 'I am about to kill myself. I need your help'? The world of drugs separated me from my relationship with them."

As he lay in bed that night, he felt tired. Tired of the pressure. Tired of the anger. Tired of the hurt. Tired of living. The death of his father was so traumatic to him.

He got out of bed and put on his best clothes. He wrote his will and good-bye letters to his family and friends. He was so angry at his father for dying early, he decided to kill himself over his father's grave. Byron sat in the cemetery with his friend's rifle under his chin. He tried to pull the trigger, but couldn't. He tried again and again. Completely frustrated with himself, he threw a bottle of liquor and say, “what am I doing?. Then he put the rifle under his chin and pulled the trigger again but didn’t work.

After sometime, he realized what his step-dad told him how much God loved him. He looked back at the graveyard with teary eyed and whisper, “Lord help me.” A day after, he came to you for counseling (as referred by his friend), related the whole story as written.

1. Based on the above-mentioned case, how would you assess Byron? Describe his life experiences in view of his relationship with his biological father and his situation living with mother and step-father. (25 pts)

Answer 1

Byron was thirteen years old when his father expired. He was very much attached to his father. It traumatized him and he could not forget his father. A year later his mother remarried. After her remarriage her mother’s attitude towards Byron has changed, that is what he thought. There was a communication problem and adjusting to the new home environment was difficult for him. He found himself in a dark environment. He could not see his mother cuddled by his stepdad.

The situation made him sad and engaged in an argument with the mother. Byron never approved of his stepdad thus if he says good thing like God loves you very much also annoy him.

He did not like the school assembly he did not like anyone given him any suggestion.

He could not accept the reality thus separated himself from it and from the people who loved him.

Byron was sad, angry, broken, and had the feeling of emptiness. He was always hoping for the best, but the thought it did not exist for him.

He wanted to seek help from the people who loved him, but he could not do so.

He wrote a deep suicide note, put on his best clothes, wrote goodbye letters to friends and dear ones.

He went to his father's grave as he was very angry on him leaving him early, he tried tokill himself, but he was unsuccessful.

Suddenly unconsciously he remembered the words his stepdad had told him how much God loved him.

He realized his mistake asked for pardon from God.

Analyzing his situation it looks his relation with his biological father was very good, he was attached to him and loved him.

His relationship with his mother according to him was good till his father was alive.

After her remarriage he felt his mother has changed, she did not like him anymore the way she used to love when his father was alive.

His relation with his stepdad was not good, he never liked him and he never liked him cuddling his mother. Byron could not adjust to the new environment.

From the attitude of his father, it looks he believed in God, and he wanted to show his love to Byron but he did not accept it.

When sitting on his father's grave he tried to kill himself the words of his stepfather saved him from taking the drastic step. That shows that his words had remained in his unconscious mind.

Byron had compared his stepdad with his biological father.

He ever responded to his love and care.

He could not see his mother with a stranger other than his father. That had drifted him away from his mother and that made his adjustment to the new environment difficult.

When he could not make himself take help from those who loved him he took refuge in drugs, although it was in the school assembly they were taught not to take refuge in drugs or suicide.

From analyzing his history, family therapy would work better.

To remove his ill feelings and to get to know his father and mother from a new angle a communication between three of them is important. The family therapy is used to dissolve conflict between parents and children. As he had started taking drugs he needed family support.

Family therapy works best when there is anger, misunderstanding, and conflict between the parents and children. As Byron had acknowledged his stepdad's words that God loves him reconciliation would be easier.