Question

It is one thing to intellectually learn all of these theories and concepts. It is another to actually put those concepts into practice. It is when we apply what we have learned to our lives that we will experience real change. I want to challenge you to apply the techniques for active, empathetic and responsive listening. This exercise will take intentionality and planning for it to be worthwhile.

Begin by choosing someone with whom you will be having this conversation. Is there someone whom you have been neglecting in the listening department? Is there someone who is typically unheard? Or do you have an unresolved conflict that would benefit from some active listening?

After you have chosen, be sure to set the stage properly for listening. Review key concepts from this week and think through how you will apply them. Next, challenge yourself by implementing these concepts in a real conversation. Feel free to ask the individual afterward, how you did and if they felt heard. Take notes soon after the conversation is over, so it is fresh in your mind. Write a response describing your experience and applying each of the concepts used

Answer 1

Some of the techniques which would be used for active, empathetic and responsive listening are listed below.

- Active Listening

a. Pay attention and show that you are listening.

b. Provide feedback.

c. Defer judgment

d. And respond appropriately.

- Empathetic Listening

a. Be quiet

b. Assure that you are understanding

c. Understand the emotion of the speaker.

- Responsive Listening

a. Smile

b. Keep appropriate facial expression

c. Nodding the head in affirmation

d. Appropriate eye contact

e. Leaning slightly towards the speaker

f. If required, making notes of the speaker’s words and what is spoken.

These are some of the widely used general techniques which can be used for empathetic, active and responsive listening.

Now the person that I chose for the conversation is the maid that comes to my home for helping my mom with the household works. She is lady around an age of 35/36 years and a mother of two kids. The reason I started noting her was she was always having a gloomy face and a very lean body structure. But she seldom speaks to anyone. She come home finishes the works and leaves. So I decided to give her sometime and talk to her. I asked her to wait after the work hours so as to talk to her.

She waited for me and I spoke with her. She started saying me her story which I sat and heard wholly. It was about her family and her problems with staying away from her husband as her mom was not in good terms with him. And she can’t leave her mom and go with her husband as she was ailing from many diseases and is a widow. But the maid and her two kids are not happy without being with their father.

And her mother was creating a lot of troubles. She was coming for the jobs for the money to payoff the bills and debts and her mother doesnot give any money that she has so as to pay off the debts.

We spoke for almost an hour, and at the end i could see a smile on her face. I asked her how she felt and she told that the whole convesration made her feel open and as if she had kept something heavy outside. I assured her i would be there to listen to her story daily and come and talk to me.

And more than her even i felt good as was able to give her a space to talk and convey her stories. This was totally revitalising.