Question

John, a teacher from Belize, traveled to the United States as a part of a teacher exchange program. He was to stay with Mitchell and Marla Dalton, teachers who reside in Eugene, Oregon. During his visit, John was to experience American culture first-hand by living with the Daltons. In turn, he had to teach small groups of teachers from the local community about Belizean culture; his American colleagues believed that he was quite successful in this task. During the first few days, things seemed to be fairly comfortable for John and the Daltons. The excitement of being in such a new and different place kept John open-eyed and involved wherever he went. The Daltons were also thrilled to be hosting their first overseas guest. However, things soon turned sour, especially for Marla. She was often complaining to her husband, Mitchell, about feeling like a servant. There was more food to prepare, extra laundry to do, day and evening outings to attend, and an extra person in an already small house to accommodate. Her breaking point occurred midway through a breakfast she had prepared. John shoved an empty glass in front of Mrs. Dalton, and in a "taking for granted" brusque tone stated, "More". With this, Marla refused to prepare any more meals, and vowed never to host a foreign guest again. Based on your evaluation of John's behavior, rate your response on a scale from one (completely agree) to five (completely disagree). Do you agree with what John did or said, and why? What solution might you have offered to rectify the situation between John and Marla?

Answer 1

I would rate John’s behaviour at 4. I slightly disagree with what John said and how he behaved because even though he was a guest at the Dalton’s home, it seems that he was not very conscientious with respect to his chores. The final action of brusquely asking for water also seems unacceptable. However, I would not say that I completely disagree with his actions because there doesn’t appear to be any malicious or evil intent behind it.

Though I know little about his culture, his attitude might be a reflection of his societal norms where women maybe left responsible to fully take care of household chores. If that’s the case, I would create a space for dialogue between Marla and John. I would make Marla understand how his behaviour might be unintentional and not spiteful. On the other hand, I would make John aware of his carelessness in taking care of himself and encourage him to participate more in taking care of the host’s house.