Question

" George Bernard Shaw, an Irish Playwright once stated that “Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything”. A similar kind of example is presented by my classmate Melanie, who wanted to start her career either as a sportswoman or a businessperson.

Melanie had a strong passion for playing volleyball because she played it for around 11 years. Melanie enjoyed playing volleyball because it helped to refresh her mind and enabled her to enjoy good physical strength. Although my friend Melanie had greater experience in playing volleyball, she had to quit her sophomore year for getting a job.

Melanie did not want to quit her sophomore year, but at the same time she wanted to progress in her career field. A change was necessary to have a multiple experiences of both sports and professional industry at the same time.

Recently, Melanie has enrolled herself as a freshmen in the field of finance. Apart from sports, she had a keen interest in starting a business set up of her own. Melanie always had a keen interest in starting a business, therefore she was quite good at managing business related problems.

As a child, Melanie had a dream of running a pan cake restaurant. However, pancake restaurant was not a practical choice, therefore Melanie had to change her mind set and she starting showing a keen interest in pharmaceutical sales over couple of years ago. Melanie’s decision to opt for a field of finance is effective because it will bring her a lot of opportunities in near future.

Playing volley ball or starting a business set up is ultimately the choice of Melanie, but I think that Melanie did a great job by bringing a huge change in her life.

All of my best wishes are with Melanie. I pray that she enjoys tremendous success in her life."

However, I would like you to fix these points/ facts:

1) she had to quit her sophomore year for getting a job.
Right Fact: In her sophomore year, she quit playing volleyball in order to find a job.

2) who wanted to start her career either as a sportswoman or a businessperson.
Fact: I asked her if she had to choice between 2 majors she told me
that she have always been good with business type thing only.
3) Accordingly fix this according to the above information:
Melanie did not want to quit her sophomore year, but at the same time she wanted to progress in her career field. A change was necessary to have a multiple experiences of both sports and professional industry at the same time.
Also this; \

Playing volley ball or starting a business set up is ultimately the choice of Melanie, but I think that Melanie did a great job by bringing a huge change in her life. /

5) she did not said that she was quite good at managing business related problems. 6) help me find the write quote for my speech...

Peer-classmate introduction speech:
help me with my 2 min professional speech about my classmate.
Need to start with a inspirational quote that present something about her
Information about her:
she is a freshmen studying finance.
she have always been good with business type thing. as a child she wanted to own a pancake restaurant (which wasn’t practical) but she just got interested in pharmaceutical sales a couple years ago, but with a finance degree she could do a lot of different things with it.
she played volleyball for 11 years. She quite in her sophomore year to get a job! she miss it a lot.

Answer 1

It is rightly said that “ change your thoughts and you can change your life” and “ everything in life is about choices, if you want a different result make a different choice.” My friend melanie has adopted the learnings of both these quotations in her life and selected the suitable path for herself. She was a very good volleyball player for 11 years . She enjoyed it because it helped to refresh her mind and enabled her to enjoy good physical strength. But since she had to find a job she quit colleyball in her sophomore year. She chose a job over the volleyball and at the same time changed herself despite of the fact that she did not want to quit volleyball. Whenever i asked her about her career she always told me that business is her thing. So to be succesful in her career she decided to change herself. Recently, melanie has enrolled herself as a freshman in the field of bfinance. She always wanted to open up a pancake restaurant and start her business but since that was not an appropriate choice she changed it to the pharmaceutical sales which hmshe has been running over a couple of years ago now. She has rightly chosen what she wanted and has a suitable path for herself. Even she has faced choices at every phase of her life but she chose thoughtfully and changed a lot of her decisions as well. Her decisions on which she finally chose to move forward have till now proven to be good for her and i wish that it works the same for her in future. I pray that she gets tremendous success in her life.